Sometimes you just can't hold it in anymore

     iMAC or eMACHINE?      Vote for your choice!

Seeing double?
Did you notice the difference? Careful, it's subtle. eMachine manufacturers hope the similarities will push profits up as they ride Apple's coat tails all the way to the bank with their PC all-in-one internet ready models that pose more than a passing resemblance to a certain current Macintosh product.

Apple isn't laughing, however, and quickly slapped the PC company with a lawsuit. Apparently, those Mac folks can't take any "real competition."

iMac and Macintosh are copyright Macintosh Corporation, © 1999. eMachine is copyright eMachine, © 1999.


The Grand and Glorious Republic of Nickoslavia vs. Microsoft
Following hot on the heels of the landmark US Federal Court decision, The Grand and Glorious Republic of Nickoslavia has announced that it has begun the formal process required to take Microsoft to court.

To quote a top level source in the republic, Microsoft's bullying tactics and monopolization of today's market is, "...really messed up."

Apparently, the topic has been well thought out in the chambers of top governing body of the Nickoslavakian state. All that's required now is the approval of the US government to release Microsoft documents and wiretaps into the "protective custody" of Nickoslavian authorities. A war crime tribunal from the highly controversial government may even require the transportation of a number of company bigwigs into the recognized territory of Nickoslavia which may include Mr. Gates himself. "For questioning," said the head of the Nickoslav Army.

No word yet on how the US will respond, but it's clear that Bill's problems are far from over. Legal and otherwise.

Microsoft and Bill Gates are registered trademarks of Microsoft Corporation, © 1999.


US Marine Corps.
Due to large budget cuts and decreased federal spending on the Marine Corps., many of its number have likely taken to vigilante style tactics and have begun to take over the country, city by city.

The strategy is simple, destroy the populace from within, without them even knowing about it.
Credible sources tell w2.4mg.com that the Corps. may have even stooped so low as to force certain teenagers of high school age to become "little jar heads," so to speak.

Masquerading as "high school JROTC units" these groups of children are slowly trained in forms of combat and then secretly armed. They walk the streets, undetected by most, ready to take control at any moment and give it over to the Corps.
JROTC on patrol
Shopping Mall Covered
Pictured at left is a group of Marines probably stationed at a small New England mall parking lot. That poor city has become so overrun by mercenary Marines that even their places of business are crowded with Corps. gunnery.

Of course truth like this has never been reported, until now. More on this as information becomes available.

The United States Marine Corps. is a registered trademark of The United States of America, © 1999. Well, we wanted to cover everything :)

     AFTER MANY YEARS OF PROMISING    Land Rover Finally Delivers!

Meat Flavored Machinery.

The car industry has always been a tooth and nail profession. Now Land Rover leads what will hopefully become a virtual revolution among car companies in Y2k compliance by the skin of its teeth.

This little item has been awaited by the team here at w2.4mg.com for quite a while: the world's first completely edible sport utility vehicle. Made entirely of beef jerky, it is a marvel of American creativity and ingenuity. While at first it is understandable to think of this as a bit odd, you may be able to understand why this is important if you try to imagine the following scenarios:

  • Your family wants to go on a picnic in the outdoors, but it won't stop raining.

  • You just have to have a snack while waiting at those long lights in the noon-time traffic.

  • You're escaping Russian nukes that have been fired because of a Y2k computer glitch. In an ironic turn of events, you run out of gas somewhere in the middle of Kansas. No civilization for at least 10 miles, in any direction.

  • In each of these situations the Jerky Land Rover would come in quite useful, don't you think?

    Representatives of Land Rover gave w2.4mg.com a rare interview in which staff reporters asked such groundbreaking questions as, "Will there be a Turkey Jerky version of the vehicle?" Land Rover assured us that other flavors were in the works and when asked what they did to make the windows of this tasty truck, a glass specialist explained, "You just don't know how far jerky can stretch."

    I guess we don't.

    Land Rover is a registered trademark of Land Rover, © 1999.


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