Sometimes you just can't hold it in anymore

     POKÉMON BATTLE ROYAL! Pokémon Stadium first impressions.

Pokémon Battle Royal

Earlier today I sat down with esteemed representatives of Ibutsu.com and Squick.org to critique Matt's brother's newly bought copy of Pokémon Stadium. From the first minute I was sure that this game was going to suck.

But that opinion soon changed. Within a half hour of turn-based battling with Jeffrey's Pokémon, the reputation of w2.4mg.com began to fall into question. Ibutsu had beat the living crap out of us with their blasted Mew's. Argghhhh.

Finally we decided to only duke it out with rental Pokémon. Soon I became so bored that I found myself quickly cycling through the menu screens six times just to get out of the stupid Pokémon selection mode. I ended up selecting the Charmanders and Turtles; and that is when the Poké-fur really hit the fan. Branden made some joke about my "interesting selection powers," and we began to battle.
Squirtle: Pokémon Supreme
Squirtle's blizzard move destroys the competition.

With only one single Squirtle, I managed to destroy over half of Branden's fleet of Pokémon in one fell swoop. One by one they fell before the mighty Squirtle; there was no stopping him.

Anyway, the oddest part is that this game is nowhere near as bad as I initially thought. I think Matt said it best, "I find it scary that not only do you not hate it anymore, but you actually... like it!

Well, maybe. But I still loathe Pokémon. Squirtle is simply an exception.

     THE TRUTH ABOUT KENNEWICK MAN! Trekkies overjoyed.

The Kennewick Man!
Four years ago, two young boat racers stumbling through the muddy banks of Kennewick, Washington, came across a skull resting comfortably in the Columbia River.

Will Thomas, the more adventurous of the two, had been wading through the river when he stumbled onto what he believed to be a giant petrified turd.

"It was round. It was brown...
All of a sudden, I saw teeth..."

In a stunning disregard for archaeological decorum, the men stuffed the skull under a few bushes and headed upstream.

"We knew it was still going to be there," Thomas said. The skull had sat around for at least 9,000 years anyway, so he wasn't exactly in a hurry to leave. Even from the onset their discovery has sparked controversy.

You see, many American Indians believe this may be the skull of one of the original settlers to cross the continental bridge near the Bering Strait. These same Indians are angered by local authorities' attempts to date the skull by using the latest in the field of mitochondrial DNA analysis (try saying that three times fast). Because he may be of Indian origin, local tribes didn't want to test his DNA and further disturb the corpse.

Strangely enough, the team here at w2.4mg.com agrees with these Indians. New findings show that such extensive testing is simply unneccessary.
The Kennewick Man!
The Kennewick Man?
Seperated at birth?

A crime lab mock up of the Kennewick Man clearly shows that he could be none other than Patrick Stewart, of Star Trek fame. I, for one, am in a total state of shock.

     AND NOW, WITHOUT FURTHER ADO My obligatory Westmont rant.

Westmont High School
It's just come to my attention that I have not bashed Westmont in quite a while. Well, I apologize, I've been on sort of a hiatus doing Senior Project stuff.

That's right, the Westmont High School Senior Project. The one last chance the English department has to slash at a near graduate's heel as they earnestly fumble for their diploma. The final school project that hopes to sift out the slackers from the diligent workers. A true glimpse of the working world just before we are thrown into its waiting jaws.

It is to laugh.

Why must we, as graduating seniors, endure such punishment. Why is it that we are again forced to live through what seems to be an endless array of due dates and project checkpoints. Why do each and every one of us sit idly by as we are force fed Ethics in the Workplace that cater to the simple minded.

Example: "Hi Terry, I'm Larry. I'm going out on a 'power lunch.' Very serious business, my friend. I may not be back till tomorrow, I need to shine my golfing shoes."

H'yuck, h'yuck, h'yuck.

I guess I'm a little peeved about this project because I have to turn in logs of my progress. Each and every minute detail must be represented in the log. Heaven forbid I actually did something too close to the deadline!

     HOW FAIR THOU SEEMEST, PLAYSTATION 2 But is face value decieving?

The Playstation 2
Last week, Japanese fan boys ran to their respective electronic boutiques and layed down their handfulls of yen. The day they had dreamed of for two years had finally come. Life took on new meaning to little children and game crazed thiry year olds alike as they ripped open sleek blue boxes and pulled out the most beautiful machine they had ever layed their eyes on. It was here, the PS2. Their reason for living in this first week of March.

128 bits of processing power all stuffed into a little four pound box that plays DVD's. Probably well worth the purchase price. But in this lies the question, do I really want to spend so much?

And the answer is, of course, no.

Four hundred dollars is a bit steep when it comes to buying a video game console, and I always suspected that I wouldn't be buying this sucker before it fell, gracefully of course, into Wallmart's bargain bin.

But somehow, I feel a bit like a little kid would who waited and waited to meet the man who made their favorite video game, only to sulk away disapointed because he only spoke Japanese. I mean sure, I knew this stupid thing was supposed to cost, but I had no idea it was going to cause that much of a dent in my wallet.

Just another reason to stay with the N64 and buy a Dolphin.
Nintendo 64


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